My First Adult Christmas

Christmas is over. New Year has happened. It's time to take down the decorations, go back to work and get on with being broke.

If you say bad things about Christmas after it has gone, does that make you a Scrooge? What if you put in your best effort, wore your best smile and poured your heart into your gifts? I did that.

But forgive me for being controversial here; what is the point to it all? I'm most definetely not the first person to comment on this what with the capitalism of Christmas and all other holidays that companies cash in on. But this year it was my first "Adult Christmas"

Without the kids, leaving out some milk for Santa, seeing their faces when they notice all the presents surrounding the living room and going out to play on their bikes etc... where is the fun? Don't get me wrong, everyone enjoys receiving and opening presents and I am so grateful for everything that I have been given, but there's always that thing of; "Oh God, my present for 'so and so' isn't as good as this." or "great, this bath set can add to the collection of 15 I have at home from previous years", or worse, the dreaded presents you hate (mine are usually from my Dad- although I should feel lucky to even have them I guess). I just mean that present opening has been tainted with adulthood! Even the presents themselves are for adults. I can't spend Christmas day playing with my new moisturiser, or saucepan set. Saying that, my family spent the entire day pampering themselves and applying masses of make-up; whilst simultaneously remaining glued to their shiny new ipods and blackberries. A teenage Christmas leans into both Kids and Adult Christmas, no wonder they are so angsty... Then there are those presents that you get loads of and it makes you 'think'about their meaning... Last year I recieved 6 bottles of perfume from different people, I was like "Do I smell?" This year, I got 3 money boxes... people must have recognised my poorness; it's sweet they want to help me to save, but having lots of empty money boxes is somewhat depressing.

My girlfriend's favourite part of Christmas is the food. Being an Adult, you have the option of how involved to be in the making of the Christmas dinner. Since meeting my wonderful girlfriend, I have realised my passion for cooking and good food! Forgive me for becoming a bit of a "snob", or as I prefer, "perfectionist"... there is nothing wrong with wanting the dinner to be nice! When I was a child, I was the fussiest eater on Earth; my mum proudly reminds me of my diet of cheese on toast, yoghurt and chips at every opportunity (it's still all she can cook). Now, I try my best to show off my cooking skills, and make nice food and yet I am still mocked. This year they were going on about how last year I kicked my auntie out of the kitchen. Bear in mind that this kitchen barely fits one person in it! Ever hear the phrase, "too many cooks spoil the broth?!" This year there was more drama about the cooking, and I was centred in it. It continued right through the eating of the dinner, and sucked the Christmasyness out of it. I didn't even read out my joke; I know.

Finally, the boredom of an adult Christmas. Maybe the TV was shit, or my family are just too lazy to play games or do fun things, but it was bone dry. I don't blame my youngest aunt for going to her boyfriend's, but part of me felt that her absence made it so dull! They were all in bed by 10.30pm (I'm not going to mention their young age, they deserve to feel old!), and I was left half-drunk with my teenage sisters (still stuck to their screens and not interested in hanging with their uncool big sis moaning about how crap everyone is). And that was it! Over! All the anticipation, all the money, all the shit people go through, for that one disappointing day.

And the reason I say why do we do it, is because we aren't even Christians! Not once in all my years have we ever even thought of, let alone mentioned Jesus in our house. We don't believe in God, nor do we even say a word or two about how lucky or glad we are to have each other. It is literally a cross between a ritual and feeding frenzy; "get, get, get". I'm not exempting myself from it; I enjoy putting in time and effort into my presents, and spending time with my family altogether, but it just seems a bit weird.

Don't get me started on New Year...

Books Vs Films

Without sounding like a complete geek, actually I think it might be unavoidable, I'd like to talk about the Twilight and Harry Potter books/films. No matter how much “jip” -I've never used that word in my life and have no idea how it is spelt- the books receive for being teen/kids books, they make an excellent read! The Twilight books got me so hooked I got my girlfriend's brother to drive me to the town centre so I could spend what little money I had to live on getting the next one; after spending an entire day searching the MANY charity shops on Bristol's Gloucester Road, (I know, I could have just waited and borrowed it from a library/my mum days later). The point was... they are undeniably good books despite their lack of literary splendour.

It's the same with Harry Potter. At university my friends and I constantly got into a debate about this; we had one friend in particular who argued that people's reaction to the books made him feel ashamed of society because they are “kids books” and are completely unchallenging, simple and idiotic. We would all argue that no matter what the style of writing was like, it should always be seen as a positive that something was able to get people excited about reading again. Despite all of the debates around whether it deserves as much credit as it receives, the point is; they are actually probably the most enjoyable books I have ever read. I, like many others I know, can read them over and over again and will always find new little twists or snippets of humour that I missed the other 20 times... The characters, plot and secrets are so well thought out, planned and cleverly arranged that it does not matter if the language is simple! The way the spells reference actual Latin meanings, and the fact that J.K invents an entire world that co-exists among our own in such a believable, yet remarkably creative way make these books nothing less than genius. OK, I confess, I am a big geek.

I got a little carried away there, (you should have seen these debates; poor John). But what I really came here to discuss is the film adaptations. It must be hard; everyone knows that a book can contain far more detail, character development, insight and description than a 2-3 hour film. I'll give them that; it must be hard. Sometimes they do it quite well, considering.

But, I tell you what it shouldn't be so hard to do... Cast people that can act! When you read a book you do not know exactly what a character would look like; yet this seems to be what the casting is based on. What about the ability to portray a character? Maybe it is the director's faults. Maybe a character is too subjective, but I just know that Daniel Radcliffe's “I'm a, I'm a what...?” is the most cringe-worthy line I've ever seen delivered. And Kristen Stewart as Bella Swan is just as bad; yes she is hot (I mean, looks the part) and captures the moody teenager quite well, but I don't for one second believe that she even knows who Edward is, let alone love him. For example, in New Moon, when they're with the Volturi and she's telling them not to hurt Edward, she may as well be asking them not to hurt a fly. Even Robert Pattinson, yes he's "cute" but is he "Edward"? Er, no.

I must admit, with book adaptations the rules of film seem to change. It seems the only circumstance in which the sequels are better than the original. It's like they get better with practise. I wouldn't even dream of trying to re-watch Harry Potter and the Philosopher's Stone, and cringe at New Moon, but Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire, and Eclipse are much more satisfying.

That brings me on to another thing. It's a sad enough fact to know that some parts will have to be missed out, but to have the CHEEK to change the story! Like in The Order of the Phoenix; where Harry is idiotically waiting underneath and watching Dumbledore get killed without attempting to stop Malfoy, instead of being forced to the wall by Dumbledore as in the books... is RIDICULOUS and downright annoying.

And yet I always look forward to the next movies. If only there were a way to watch the entire book exactly how it plays out in your head when you read it. I mean, not that I like Twilight or Harry Potter...

Bloomberg New Contemporaries 2010

Where? Institute of Contemporary Art
When?  26 November - 23 January
What? A snapshot of emerging art, featuring selected art works by recent graduates.
How much? Free



I will start by saying I have always loved this small, intimate gallery space. The fact that it hides in the corner, but when you walk in you delve straight into an underground arty atmosphere gets me right in the mood. The shop and cafe, like any gallery are a little overpriced but have a kooky, artsy vibe that make you wish you could afford to go there all the time.

This exhibition does not disappoint. I half expected to be confronted with the usual mix of mediocre, bad and rare, surprisingly good pieces that one sees at a graduate show, but the standard of most works was high. I enjoyed the mix of styles, mediums and subjects and thought it was curated very well.

Surprisingly, the pieces that stood out most for me were the video pieces; as I don't usually tend to 'get' or like them. The piece with the dice in the sea, interactive video and even the animation were all simple ideas, but very powerful and quirky. I did not enjoy the abstract paintings as much; I think that everything that can be said from squares of colour has been said!

The work downstairs is slightly more engaging, and don't forget to look in the corridor. Overall, this exhibition of 'contemporaries' did not make me feel depressed about the current state of the Arts; which is an achievement! One that viewing the London graduate shows earlier in the year did not achieve. I recommend getting along to this show before it finishes!

Until Next Time,
Roxanne

The Birth of a Critic

I confess, I studied for my degree at Goldsmiths College. I may have even conformed to the Goldsmiths stereotype I critiqued in my dissertation. I had to; to get the marks! Studying at Goldsmiths turned me into a harsh art critic. Was it the critiques I was faced with on a weekly basis, or the (often crap) art I was subjected to? A few of my old peers feel the same, as we often feel hatred towards 'modern' or contemporary art and its pretentiousness, or "wankiness" as I like to call it. There is always some distaste for fashionable art (I like to think).

But like any art lover, I have an instictive appreciation for artworks; that I pretend is superior and unquestionnable. I like to believe I know when art works are great, unique or 'genius'. If I had the money, I'd give collecting a go to see if the market agreed with me, but until then, I'll stick to sharing my opinions of wanky contemporary art; and even of the antiquities I adore. My opinions are not superior or unquestionnable at all, but a critic has been born! And you can always critique a critique.